What it means to be a Protector.
According to the Oxford Dictionary, a protector is someone who protects or guards, by assignment or on their initiative.
As men, it is our inherited duty to be protectors.
We have been assigned to protect our families (whether you are the son or father it does not matter), our friends and anyone who needs it.
We can’t help it. It is a natural occurrence that at some point in our lives as boys we stood up for someone being bullied without even thinking. But somewhere along our journey of life, we were hurt and we decided to suppress our inner protector and mind our own business.
This is why so many men love army movies, cop shows and movies like Braveheart because it speaks to their inner warrior and protector who yearns to be set free. Men envision themselves living the life of service as soldiers or Scottish knights.
I encourage you, soldier of God, do not let the voice of the world overthrow your warrior heart, do not let it fill you with fear and doubt. Listen to that voice in you that encourages you to rescue the beauty and stand up against the tyrant.
She wants the be rescued, but she will stay in that tower forever if you don’t get out of your comfort zone and you will stay forever a slave if you let tyranny prevail.
I must warn you, this isn’t an easy path. Many will not like you some might even hate you but do not be dismayed, my friend.
Everyone loves a warrior when the enemy is at the gate.
How to actively be a protector.
- Lead your family in the right direction.
As the father, husband or boyfriend, we have to lead in preparing our family, wives and girlfriends for what might happen. We have to lead from the front and set the example.
We set the example by going to the gym, eating healthy and or going to the range and honing our marksman skills. If we involve our loved ones in these activities and make a day of it then it becomes a great bonding experience and everyone learns something cool.
- Prepare your family for attacks and unforeseen circumstances so they know what to do. e.g. house robber, active shooter, fight etc.
It takes more than refining our skill set we have to train, teach and prepare our family too otherwise they will get hurt. They have to know just as much as we do to make it out alive.
Everyone should know their roles in any situation.
They don’t know what they don’t know so how are they supposed to know what to do under stress? Every member of our family should know that when Dad gives “these” orders the the following has to happen.
Now no one will ever be 100% combat-ready however it does help to prepare our mind.
Rehearse the plan with them and make sure everyone is well-informed.
- Our family has to be the priority in any situation.
When we get married we make a vow to serve and protect our wives and then later our kids, thus making them the absolute numero uno priority in any situation.
If the building is on fire we carry them out, if there is an active shooter, we put our body in front of them.
We are their shield.
- No Surrender.
Where our family is concerned we buckle down, fight and die if it comes to it. To me, the ultimate act of love is dying in the service of others especially the ones you love.
Like it says in the Bible John 15:13 “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.”
We as men are natural-born protectors so it is fulfilling for us to live in that role. They are our responsibility and we should embrace that.
If we as men are feeling pressure then we are doing it right. Life as a man is tough but extremely fulfilling. If we have our women supporting us and helping us then there is nothing we can’t do.
Ignore the tumult.
"A harmless man is not a good man. A good man is a very dangerous man who has that under voluntary control.”
Some people will criticise us for doing this. They say “The police will do it” or “They don’t like violence” or whatever excuse they can come up with.
Regardless of what they say we know our mission and we will do what needs to be done to protect our loved ones.
Being a protector is so much more than putting on armour and a sword, so much more than carrying a gun in public and so much more than being able to curl 50kgs.
It’s physical, emotional, and financial protection.
We need to be able to hold babies and protect them in one hand and be prepared to slit throats with the other hand.
This should be our mindset. A warrior and a nurturer. We can never be the fully operational warriors every day and we can never be the nurturer every day. Every moment can call for each one or a balance between the two.
Being an emotional protector is an equally important part of being a protector.
Emotional well-being is vital for our health and everyday life.
There is so much research out there on the benefits of developing good emotional and social skills and how important it is that these skills be taught from a young age.
As the protectors of our households, we need to teach our children good social skills and teach them how to control their emotions. Because in any social interaction, there will be someone or something that upsets us and learning to master one’s emotions is a vital skill.
The lesson to process emotions, think and respond out of a place of rationality is a lesson that will stay with them forever.
Teaching our children this in their preteen years so that they can practice this in their adolescence when life is confusing will help them navigate their minds and any situation and then that will continue throughout their lives and they will become mentally resilient.
Let us not forget about the loves of our lives. Our dear wives/girlfriends.
We can teach them this as well. Generally speaking, women are more emotional beings. Thus as their complementary opposite, we can be the ones they can rely on for emotional support and we can give them some stoic wisdom.
Financial protection is making sure that your family has everything they need. When times are tough the father gives the most and needs the least.
This is why fatherhood is so fulfilling because we are responsible for the well-being of our family and if we can do that successfully then we have accomplished something great within ourselves and proved that we have what it takes.
Men love being a provider.
That is the beauty of fatherhood. The service and selflessness.
Conclusion.
By following these principles and making it our life mission we will be the protectors that we have to potential to be.
There is an old Christian Proverb that says “Choose a partner that you can go to war with”.
This is true for men and women. Find a man that wants to fight for you and your heart and find a woman that is fine with you doing so.
Whether fighting a real war, a crime or marital battles she must accept that you are a fighter and that you are in tune with God and His will.
Let me say that this isn’t something that is taught anymore or that can be learned overnight. Young boys and men don’t know this and neither do the women. That is why there is Grace.
People learn, change and improve.
So gentlemen, learn these things with haste because one day your life might depend on it.
